She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
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