Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
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