So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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