i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
