Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
how does that bad decision feel?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
