Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
