so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
