I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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