i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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