doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Randomize
