I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
