I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
