Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
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