My girlfriend figured out who you are.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Randomize
