I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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