Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Couch. On fire.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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