Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
