never play flip cup with pint glasses
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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