Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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