Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
