i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Randomize
