you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
