just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
