idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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