I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I feel like a drive thru vagina
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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