He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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