So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
