Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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