so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
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