you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
