How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
This is the prime rib incident all over again
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize