i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
