So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I have post one night stand depression
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
