hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I just had sex on a roof
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
