if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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