i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize