4 words: hood of his car
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
