Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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