I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
We need to rekindle our bromance
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
