Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
