You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I met the friendliest cop last night
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I need to stop coming to work sober
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
