This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
