i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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