that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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