i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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