i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
