WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
