You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
