What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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