Whod you bang
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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